"Men
use anger as a form of control" read a leading local news item but the
truth is that by responding emotionally with anger to get back control both men
and women fall further out of control, a dangerous trap!
My
reply in the opinion page was "If you never lost control in the first
place, you wouldn't need to get it back in the second place”.
In
any domestic dispute or struggle for power, whoever intimidates and draws first
blood wins, leaving those who respond resentfully in an inferior position,
submissive or violent. Anger repressed or expressed is a weakness.
If
I hand you a hot potato and you don't take it, it burns me. Likewise, if you
could learn how to stay calm, poised under pressure, the manipulator's motive
backfires and upsets him.
The
patient no response gives him one of two choices, to apologize, to become your
friend or stay angry and keep on burning him or herself. I'm Roy Masters with
your emotional health minute.
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